Footwear

Dear Wedding Planner,

I'm in a quandary about the right shoes to wear to Cath and Stefan's wedding-- a grassy slope in Northeastern Vermont in mid August! I certainly want to be fashionable, but also want good traction. Any thoughts?

Shoeless and Clueless

Dear Shoeless,

Of course, fashion is always subjective but there are certain classic pairings that should be observed such as these obvious ones: if you are wearing a terry robe, footwear should be slippers- preferably ones with Muppet characters. If you are wearing a mu mu, shoes should be macrame. Tweed Suit/Pink Jellies. Chaps/flippers. You get the idea.

But, you are right to consider the added element of traction so, I suggest that whatever classic pairing you decide upon, you then add a layer of whale blubber, easily obtained from Norwegian convenience stores. That should keep you from having an embarrassing tumble!

- The Wedding Planner